Tuesday, March 31 2015....it's Tuesday.

If someone wants to help me with some sewing that would be very helpful.

I used to be awesome at sewing I could do all kinds of things. Not everything but I was freaking awesome. 

I always took pride in the fact that I could sew better than most women. I was good. 

Maybe that's part of the reason....well whatever.

The kids want robes. Hard to find for boys. Even harder when you want what they want. 

They are their fathers kids. 

Part of the reason that i started sewing is so I could make the clothes I wanted. You could get clothes that would fit me but not that I liked. If you put on top of that the fact that I am from a very small town I was just out of luck. So I learned to make the clothes I wanted more. 

I am getting ready to go on a trip to Colorado. I wanted to go last year but to many moves and other things got in the way. I plan to buy some winter weather clothes. But we will see when I get there. I am flying and I really hope that all goes well with my chair. I get kind of nervous giving my chair to baggage handlers. I think if everyone had to hand over there legs then they got on an airplane we would have a much safer world. It my be a dream but I am still aloud I think. Dreams haven't been outlawed yet?

 I am not going to lie I am tired and I don't know what to write more. 

Thursday March 19, 2015....I'm fine.

I do not know what to say. 

About my life with Marcy.  Choosing not to say something is not the same as lying. If you feel like you have been lied to sorry about that.  I can live with it, can you?  Probably. I guess you could say I  learned from the best. And sometimes you can't handle the truth....or facts or whatever you want to call it. 

Well there I said it. 

I said at one time I wouldn't mention it but I have been so tired lately I can hardly stand it.  There has almost been so much who knows. I think that my kids get sick at their moms house. Not that me or anyone could do anything. Kids go to school and who knows what they may get there. Well, we'll just have to make the best of it. 

I was told that wearing dark glasses would be a good thing for me still. In many ways I really don't want to but they help so I don't squint so much. In many ways I see glasses as a "crutch". That's the army in me talking. I guess I just need to get tough and use what helps. I wear a brace on my right leg. I hate that fact. But no one notices when I am wearing long pants. There have been a lot of things that I will do now that I was very much opposed to earlier. At one time I was very much against any type of orthotic, or brace to support a part of my body. I have slowly, very slowly, almost begrudgingly come to the realization that they can be helpful. Some of my earlier therapists would laugh at me. 

To put it nicely, I was a jerk before my stroke.  I would be such a jerk that I would try to turn people's own words against them. The thing I would say is this "a jerks a tug, a tug Is a boat, a boat is on water and water is nature, and nature is beautiful. Thank you for the compliment."  I see life before my stroke as one life and since my stroke as a new life. I know that is not the case, but I like to think of it that way. How many people get to live two lives in one lifetime. I guess you could say I'm just lucky and blessed.

I will get a new video up as soon as I can but that's how life goes.    

Sunday, March 8, 2015....,oh the fun of life.

So I have this thought somedays if someone asks you if you want a stroke just say no and walk away. 

In many ways I have been feeling kind of crumby. I have a sore throat. I don't know what happened it is no fun to say the least. I think that has unfortunately helped me to be more irritable and disagreeable than I would like to be. I have had to be extra vigilant to make sure that I don't have fits about all kinds of things. I have had more than I would like. 

One thing I did recently is go to the doctor so she could fill out a paper for me. Because of my stroke my drivers license expired. This has been a headache. But life goes on. I can still go lots of places in my chair, so I do. There are faster ways to go but my chair can get me there. 

I got an apartment. If it wasn't for the paint job it would be great. At times I think that a blind person could have done better. I know that is not nice to say, but it is a bad paint job.