17 June 2020......to much bread😳😑

Apricot nut whole-wheat. 

12 June 2020.......life is so complicated. It doesn’t need to be.

Photo of me

Photo of the bread I made

I had some trouble finding the word “physician”, mainly because I can’t spell. I had to download a dictionary with a thesaurus. 

There are only 7 uses of the word “physician”    in the New Testament. Here are most of them. 

Matthew 9

12 But when Jesus heard that, he said unto them, They that be whole need not a physician, but they that are sick.

Mark 2

17 When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

Mark 5

26 And had suffered many things of many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was nothing bettered, but rather grew worse,

Luke 4

23 And he said unto them, Ye will surely say unto me this proverb, Physician, heal thyself: whatsoever we have heard done in Capernaum, do also here in thy country.

Luke 8

43 And a woman having an issue of blood twelve years, which had spent all her living upon physicians, neither could be healed of any,

44 Came behind him, and touched the border of his garment: and immediately her issue of blood stanched.

So Christ is he Master Healer.physician. surgeon.  He allows us to help at times. 

We need to work as surgeons, in ways the Savior will guide. We have to be judicious enough to know how to do something that my cause pain for a short time, but can help in immeasurable ways. 

If you were to ask me to be your surgeon for an operation, you better prepare yourself to die. I was a mental Health professional. I only talked. I was the kind of “physician” that helps untangle the yarn that is in your head. 

I know all to well that the physical and mental are connected in such a way that they can’t be separated. Example. I went and visited a psychologist last year. After two sessions I discovered that I was frustrated and mentally “unhinged” because I can’t physically do certain things. Thanks stroke. So I have had to teach myself that life is ok even though I can’t do some things. I’ve got a very good grasp on the reality of life. I don’t have to like the reality I am given, still it’s my reality. If I want I can invent bionic trousers and maybe I can walk. 

I think that one of the biggest problems now days is that so many people think they need to enjoy and love everything they do. I don’t think life has ever worked that way. 

We are all a metaphorical “physician” or “surgeon” at something. At times we need someone who is more experienced than we are at something; mechanics, business, computers, homemakers, everyone needs a little help. That is what theSavior is available for. No one is an expert at everything. The closest thing to an expert at everything is a mom, maybe a grandma. Just ask their children or grandchildren. 

Back to the point. Everyone needs to know how to wisely and judiciously hurt in order to help. We can know if we will ask, pray. 

Somethings in this world are crazy right here now. I’ve come to the conclusion that to many things are not worth my time. I’ve had that thought for some time. Just learning it again. 

In this crazy world are we going to metaphorically run after every snake that bites us. We would die before the snakes do. 

We don’t need to look for the snakes. Some will find us whatever we may do. So much depends on what we can individually control. What can I control? What would I like to control? How can I get there?

So a little about my current goals. 

Running type exercise

I got my manual wheelchair back. Someone helped me go outside. The wheels on my chair rubbed against my arms and hands badly. I have sores that hurt on both arms and both hands. Not my idea of a good time.  So I got some arm guards and gloves and I will try again. 

Write every morning. 

Could be better but not doing bad. 

Floss teeth 

I say good 

Volunteer

Not bad. 

Budget

It is taking some effort but I’m getting there. 

No robbing/borrowing from savings 

Fine 

Spend time in nature

Part of me does not want to go outside. It is hot. Still I go. The heat can take a lot out of me. 

Read Book of Mormon daily Read General conference talks daily 

For some reason I only want to read conference talks. 

I stumbled across a video on you tube about possible Book of Mormon archeological evidence. Totally blew some of my ideas I had out of the water. Did things happen in the US or Central America?  I will just say I don’t think the Central America idea holds much validity. Ultimately where it happened is not the main point. It happened and was recorded so that we have another witness that Jesus is the Christ. 

The archeological stuff is fascinating but in so many ways secondary to the teachings from and about the Savior. 

Bake at least one loaf of bread a week, hopefully sourdough. 

I got my bread made this week. One was olive bread. 

7 June 2020......I feel like I am going mad

I am at odds with myself and what seems to be a majority of society. Lots of people support Black Lives Matter. I don’t. I’ve seen some of the more shady dealings they have. Lots of people say they do good. I have yet to see anything good come from the organization. If you have video of the good they Supposedly do message it to me. I will take a look. Right now I don’t believe the organization does anything good. If I’m wrong please send me video to prove it. 

The other thing is police. There are good police and bad. I know a policeman I go to church with. Great guy. I’ve had another help me with my wheelchair. I know there are very good police. I also know there are pathetic examples of humanity, wastes of skin, that exist. I have had my own experiences with the Bexar Country Sheriff, the county I live in. They cover for each other’s bad behavior, and turn your own words against you. I’m sure there are good deputies that work with the force but I have yet to meet one. The previous sheriff  lied though her teeth at a debate, before the last election. The current sheriff who won the last election, suggested nothing of substance. I didn’t vote for him. I’ve done my best to avoid any interaction with any sheriff personnel. My experience is they pick and choose the laws they want to enforce. If I am wrong someone please prove me wrong. I’ve had attorneys tell me the same thing about sheriff officers in surrounding counties as well. 

Now I don’t want people to think I don’t respect police. I do. They have a thankless job. They have the very real possibility that they my not return home at the end of there shift.  And that is a day in and day out possibly for many of them. That is a very real possibility I have never had to deal with. Still besides the few have personal experience, I don’t hate any. 

So a little about my current goals. 

Running type exercise

I got my manual wheelchair back from the shop. There is no way I could get out of my apartment by myself. The parking lot has a very subtle slope and is not the easiest for me to push myself on. I was hoping that I could push myself faster. I was so slow that I almost wanted to cry. I can’t push myself fast. People can walk faster.

Write every morning. 

Not doing the best. 

Floss teeth 

Doing better. 

Volunteer

Ok. 

Budget

I need to do better. 

No robbing/borrowing from savings 

Good. 

Spend time in nature

I go outside but it’s getting hot you have to go out before 8am. 

Read Book of Mormon daily Read General conference talks daily 

Doing a lot better 

Bake at least one loaf of bread a week, hopefully sourdough. 

I haven’t wanted to do a thing I just want to do nothing.