18 January 2022…..oh good grief

So, I went to the ER Sunday because I felt like crap. 

They could not find any thing wrong with me. Basically, I was told you feel like crap because you had a stroke 9 years ago.

The ER is for Emergent problems.   

I guess it has been 9 years ago since the stroke. I was 39 years old at the time. I’m 48 now. By the odds I should be dead. But if I was dead I could not annoy some people for just being alive.  What a ride it’s been. 

I still can’t do 99% of the things I would like. That is a lot. 

I finally paid off my car. So I was thinking I am rich. 

No. 

I just have access to the money I was paying towards my car. 

So after I get my credit cards paid off I will finally be able to save some money. 

I normally pay of my credit cards every month. I had a few unexpected events so I wasn’t able to pay everything off this month. Still I was able to pay more than the minimum payment. 

There is so much my children and I want to do. I am just not sure the best way to go about most of it. The main thing is maybe getting a house, at least an apartment with a bigger kitchen. I’ve been thinking maybe I can rearrange some furniture

13 January 2022….free at last

I am so upset with the VA. 

 I have been trying to call for months. I was calling and sending electronic messages. I was upset. In some ways I still am. I call the directors office. And I send a message to the patient advocate office. 

Then I got a call a couple hours later. By the end of the conversation he let me know that since I was the only veteran that made any complaint, I am therefore the only one it happened to. I know for a fact that I am not the only one. I would dare say lots of other veterans are content with mediocrity. 

I want to find some kind of device that will allow me to record my interactions there at the VA. Some things that happen there are very good and I can’t sing enough praise. Then there are moments that are so bad, like this time I want to cry. 

But to end on a slightly more pleasant note, I got my car all paid off. 

The dealership that I got it at will not be getting anymore of my business. I had a loan ready to go with my credit union. Then after I told them the interest rate my credit union had given me I thought they were going to try and beat it, so I went with the dealership. 

Fast forward and I look at the interest rate for the loan.  I was getting raped on the interest rate. 24%. I have had lots of crap to deal with on my credit score thanks to things on my credit score. Divorce will do that to you. 

 Right at that moment I decided to pay it off as soon as I could. 

Well, it is paid off now. I think I will try to be less dumb in the future.

7 January 2022….guess it’s my day

So it’s my birthday. 

I think I will make it the anniversary of my beard as well. I started in November two years ago, but I have trimmed it a couple of times, so January would be a good time to celebrate it now. Two years old. 

At this rate it will take me at least five more years before I have a beard like Dumbeldore (read Harry Potter if you don’t know who Dumbeldore is.) But he was over 100 in the books, I think. 

It is honestly so much easier to care for a beard than shaving everyday. I was a missionary, at about age 20, I didn’t have a beard. I wish I hadn’t shaved since that time. But I did have that whole army thing in between the time I served my mission and a few years ago when I had the stroke. 

I always used to think that a beard would be so hot in the summer. It’s not. It is wonderful insulation from the hot of the summer and the cold of the winter. 

I have just had to say beardruff, the dandruff from your beard, can be horrible if you don’t drink enough water. For a short time I was not drinking enough water. That made it look like my beard was constantly snowing. I tried to figure out the problem. Stay hydrated my friend. 

I stay hydrated, but I also deep clean my face. If you shave you are basically giving yourself a type of facial every time the hair gets cut off. I don’t shave so I basically power wash my face every day I shower, which is basically everyday. I don’t wash my beard with soap every day, that dries your beard hair and is no fun. Itchy. I do clean it. I get it wet and comb it when I am in the shower. It is amazing how much hair can come out sometimes. The combing helps with the exfoliating also. You let the teeth of the comb ever so slightly drag across the skin of your face. I will wash with shampoo twice a week. Baby shampoo seems to work the best. I do have other stuff that works well. I like baby shampoo the best, and I’m worth it. My beard is only two after all. 

I love having a beard. It is so much nicer than having a naked shaven face. At night when I had a shaven face, it felt like it was going to freeze. I  don’t feel like that now. 

I will admit there are people out there, I say people because some people say women can do anything a man can do. Bull. A man can’t do everything a woman can do. If a woman wants to make less of herself by trying to be like a man, so be it. The bearded lady, like in the Greatest Showman, are few and far between. Sex and gender are not two totally different things. Man equals male. Woman equals female. Neither is better than the other. Both are equally important. But back to the point. I love having a beard. Everyone that can grow one should. 

Now one thing about a beard is the KIND of hair it is. Most people start growing a beard of some kind during puberty. So basically a beard is pubic hair. So is leg hair and arm hair. Anything that is not the hair on your head is pubic hair. We have it start during puberty and we may get more throughout or lives. 

My ultimate goal, if I have one, is to be able to get my beard into a ponytail. Braiding it might be fun. Maybe Christmas ornaments at Christmas time.