"Who is more foolish the fool or the fool who follows him. " -Obi Wan Kenobi talking to Han Solo the first of the Star Wars movies.
Am I perfect? Far from it. I have more than my far share of faults. My saintly mother has been a bigger help to me than anyone I know, and it is still very easy for me to get up set with things she does to try to help me. My father-in-law one day was really feed up with the jerk I was being and told me so. At that moment it was like I was looking through a plate glass window and I new better but I was not able to stop myself. I am sure that will sound like an excuse to some. All I can say is if you would like you to have a stroke in my place...I guess it doesn't work like that. Just in case you didn't know that was a joke if you didn't laugh go ahead and do so now.
I am far from being perfect so live with that if you can.
If you have been reading this blog or my Facebook page, you know we put out a joint statement. All I can say is I am doing my best to live like we said we would in that statement. I want to say that my wife is the person I still love more than anything. And while I may have more reason to hate her I do not. We have different options of things, go figure. But that does not mean I hate anyone. Especially my wife.
I recently had the opportunity to work on some of our bills I do not know everything about them right now. I wish I would have had some help. I felt and thought that it was best to pay the house payment. Partially because if you don't have the other stuff you can still live in your house. It is hard to live in your Netflix account. The other reason I paid for the house was because I got a pre foreclosure notice in the mail. I do not wish for my family to get put on the street and I do not want the option of not being able to get another house or loan.
Now there may be different opinions about things but I want to say again I love my wife more than anything. And do not think otherwise.
Now I am very emotional. You could probably look at me cross eyed and I would cry. I tried to say thank you to a couple of people today and it was impossible for me not to cry. My therapist that was here the other day said I should just tell people how I am feeling in a mater of fact sort of way. After my experience today I am not sure that will work. Maybe my bladder is to close to my eyes. For those people who need another cue that was supposed to be funny.
The reason why I say that is it is so easy for me to be hyper emotional. I am hyper emotional at times and it can be hard if not impossible to contain myself.
I have a uncle who is an attorney. I think he has worked in a few different areas but it seems that he likes the area of adoptions the most. Anyway why am I saying this. For the most part attorneys are just people that work with each other. It is more contentious than other professions but for the most part the people are just doing a job. The attorneys for both sides have to be able to work again another day and possibly against each other again. Now I am not saying that attorneys don't have a more difficult job, but for the most part it is just a job.
I say this because before my stroke I thought that so many people were out to get me. I was probably just paranoid. I am not saying I am not now but no one has ever said anything about it.
Am I a jerk? Yes.
Am I thinking I am entitled? Yes.
Do I want everyone to like everything I do? Sure, who doesn't.
Do I feel like I have more than my fair share of problems? No comment.
All I can say right now is if you want to feel better about your own life just come and spend a couple of hours with me.
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